Yogi Bowling

 Fountain by Pool

I was only half kidding when I looked around the classroom today in yoga class and asked the instructor, “Did everyone hear that we were going to be doing some horrible poses today and that’s why so few of us showed up?”  It was more likely because it was Columbus Day but then again……

After some warm-up breaths and Chandra Namaskara 1, or Salutation to the Moon, our instructor told us that we were going to be working today on balance poses.  Oh, oh!  Am I a klutz?  Yes!  Am I balanced?  Not on your life!

First she had us doing Warrior 3.  You get into Warrior pose, bend forward over the front leg, stick the other leg out behind you and put your arms straight out in front of you.  We tried it on our mats first.  Whoops, I was listing like an unstable Tower of Pisa and wham, I started to go over but made a remarkable recovery if I do say so myself, even if it DID involve some flapping of my arms and several circles to get myself back on the mat.

“Everyone take a block and put it next to a wall,” our instructor suggested.  “Now put your foot right up along the wall and touching the block.  When you go into your Warrior Pose and then extend your leg, you can just hug the wall and focus on that block.”

There was only one problem.  My foot couldn’t be placed alongside the wall because I had about 8 inches of hip holding me away from the wall.  I think what I REALLY needed was a ballet barre placed directly in front of me.  Oy!

Next was the “Half Moon” pose.  Oh, my……if it only involved pulling my britches down a bit, that would be a piece of cake.  But no…..you have to form a triangle again with one leg up, one arm down on the mat, and one arm pointing skyward.  Sure.  This time around, when I lost my balance, I almost knocked over my neighbor.  I felt like I was bowling with my body.

“Why don’t we all go into the Child’s Pose and take some calming breaths,” our teacher suggested.  Sounded good to me.

“Is there anything we should be doing if we stand up and the room is whirling and we’re light-headed,” a classmate asked, looking a little green around the gills.

“Oh, my,” said our instructor.  “Definitely stay down on the mat.  I’d hate for you to pass out.”
Since we were all down on the mat by now, we went into some back bend poses, the Bow Pose, and the Camel Pose.  No way could I reach my ankles or feet on that last pose so I just kept my hands on the small of my back.

Then we got to do some twists.  We did one called “Half Lord of the Fishes” and it didn’t feel too bad in the modified version with one leg bent and placed on the outer edge of your other leg’s thigh.  But when she suggested we try bending that other leg and putting the foot up against our bottom, well, forget it.  It wasn’t happening.  I went back to the modified version.  Buddha, Kamakura, JapanImage via Wikipedia

“Now to increase the stretch, you can place your forearm on the outside of the bent knee.  If you can’t do that, just hold your knee,” our teacher demonstrated. Believe me, I was holding that knee for all she was worth.  I snuck a glance over at my friend.  Darn, not only was she able to bend both of her legs, but she also had her arm on the outside of the leg AND she was doing some sort of Buddha thing with her hand.  It looked quite Zen.  On the other hand, I was doing the “white-knuckle” thing with my hand.  It didn’t look Zen but it did look stable.

Next week is our last class before she turns us loose on other teachers.  We’ll be doing a Vinyasa Flow class (I’m hoping it will be greatly modified for beginners) and then she’ll tell us about all the different classes available at the center.  Believe it or not, I’m looking forward to the class AND I’m definitely planning to find another class to join to continue my yoga journey.  I would imagine if our instructor is a praying woman, she is praying it won’t be one of hers.

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Hot Flashed Funk

  • I have to laugh at your descriptions, but if you are looking forward to more classes, then you must be doing better than you let on.


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