Overheard in the Fitting Rooms

There were some great sales today and since I had a store credit to use before it expires, I thought I’d swing over to do a little shopping.  I didn’t take any pictures but I just had to share some things I overheard in the fitting room today.  Oh my, if only people realized that just because their fitting room door is closed, other folks can still hear them.

The first merry group I heard were a grown mother and daughter.  From the sound of their voices, I’d say the daughter was middle-aged and the mother was elderly.  The daughter was going on and on about whether or not certain tops were letting her n_____ of her chest show.  I felt like sticking my head out of my room and saying, “For Pete’s sake, if you’re worried about it, put a bandaid over them or wear a bra!”  But I restrained myself.  Then she started in on that age-old question…..”Ma, do you think this makes my a__ look big?  Apparently, her mother was either hard-of-hearing or had bad eyesight, because the daughter kept on asking and not getting an answer.  Once again, I was tempted to put in my two-cents and say, “Look, if you want an honest opinion, just step out in the hallway and I’ll tell you.”  Again, I restrained myself.

At the next store, I walked into the fitting room after squeezing past a portly young man who was standing right in the entrance talking to his wife, who was standing in front of the mirror as you entered the fitting area.  I got a glimpse of a large lady wearing fishnets and a mini-skirt but I was moving fast.  Frankly, I was worried about getting high because the scent of marijuana was fairly dripping off the two of them.  They were carrying on the following conversation:

She:  “So, what do you think of this outfit?”
He:  “It’s ok.”
She:  “Well, you don’t seem very enthusiastic.”
He:  “You know I don’t get excited about this stuff.  It’s ok.”
She”  “I’m going to need more positive reinforcement to wear something like this out in public.”

I REALLY wanted to yell out, “DON’T!  Find something with more fabric.”  I controlled myself.
As I was trying my own haul on, I could hear her back in her fitting room.  She was breathing like she had just run a marathon.  I thought, “What in the world?”

Then she started with the pep talk…..”OK,” she said to herself, “I got one arm in.”  And so it went.  I kind of think a larger size might have been the solution but what do I know?   Bet you didn’t know that women’s dressing rooms could be such interesting places, did you?

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